Last week, I shared some “tips” that I had to maximize tita-clubbing. Sharing more thoughts about the topic this week.
Again, all in good fun guys. Please don’t take this to heart.
GO WITH A GROUP OF OTHER TITOS AND TITAS
Crowded places, loud music, overpriced drinks: We’ve already established that those are definitely not fun. What makes it fun though, is when you’re a group of like-minded people who have the same inclinations as you do.
The best part about our tita’s night out was actually being able to share inside jokes with my friends about Madonna and fishnets, and being able to make references to the clubs of yore, such as Pravda and Embassy, without being judged or given blank stares.
It’s always more entertaining to go with a bunch titos and titas who will whine with you about the overpriced drinks and the late hours, who will share your panicked sentiments about the lack of appropriate clothing in your closet and who will chismis with you about some random milennial’s macking style.
As an added bonus, if you do decide to take my practical advise in my first post about getting a table, other titos and titas will most likely be willing to share the scandalously expensive cover charge without having to worry about how they will eat the following week. They will even laud you for thinking about these inconveniences.
Birds of a feather flock together; titos and titas who party together, stay young forever.
UPDATE YOUR PLAYLIST AND LISTEN TO THE NEW SONGS
This is coming from an old foggy who, up until recently, did not know the difference between One Direction and One Republic (insert gasp here). I also thought that Wanderland was a newly opened theme park.
My Spotify playlist is filled with 90’s hits, and I’m still quite indignant that kids nowadays consider this retro. (Overheard in a coffee shop in Subic: ‘Yeah, I love classic rock. I grew up with Nirvana and Pearl Jam’. Classic rock ka dyan.)
Even when I do get wind of new music, it’s usually a couple of months later, when its been over played in every mall, every jeepney and has been performed a number of times by Sarah Geronimo in ASAP. (Wait, is it still called ASAP??)
My husband is a little bit more up to date and still loses a bit his of hard-earned dignity when new hiphop songs play on the radio. It’s quite a spectacle seeing him groove to these potty-mouthed beats in his leather shoes and meticulously tucked- in button down shirt.
Anyway, I disgress. My point is, you cannot enjoy going to a club if you’re unfamiliar the loud, blaring music. It’s pretty much in your face and shoved down your ear drums.
So just for the week, borrow your niece’s playlist and familiarize yourselves with Sia, Ke$ha, or whoever one-name wonders kids listen to nowadays. It will make the experience more enjoyable, or at the very least bearable.
PUT THE JAGER BOMB DOWN
To be upfront, I can still consume an impressive amount of liquor. I do come from a long, proud line of alcoholics after all.
BUT I absolutely, absolutely cannot (and will not) take shots anymore. Shots immediately send me to loopy land.
Truth be told, we could have stayed another couple of hours in that party. I am an insomniac anyway. But the damn kids brought out those god-awful Jager bombs. I took a couple and immediately tapped out. Moe (who by the way can also down an indefinite amount of scotch) decided that he wanted to try to keep up with the milennials.
Let’s just say the aftermath wasn’t pretty.
Anyway, the only shots you should be taking at this age are shots of water. (yikes, that really sounded so tita.) Put the Jager bomb down.
Oh, and don’t go around experimenting with new cocktails either. My kuripot ass has always been a sucker for those happy hour, promo cocktails. When I was younger, I could handle those 30-peso tequilas. I don’t think I ever enjoyed it, but out of broke desperation, I’d subject myself to it.
Now, without fail, my constitution acts up in unbecoming ways when I take questionable cocktails. So skip the cheap seemingly sulit drinks. Those are not tita/tito friendly. We are getting too old for those ready mix gin pom drinks. We live hard lives! We pay bills and sh*t. We all deserve to drink decent alcohol.
The thing is, hangovers in your late thirties and early forties are the worst and should be avoided at all costs. I used to be mighty proud of the fact that I could party ’til around 6 in the morning and then get up at 8 to go to work without any problem. But a hangover now leaves me totally incapacitated for at least a couple of days, miserably questioning the poor judgment that possessed me to get “one last drink”.
My same-aged friends complain about the same phenomenon; I think it’s what our ancestors refer to as aging.
But, silver lining, with aging comes the wisdom to discern which poison suits us the best. Stick to your signature drink and drink it slowly. (Just a side comment: It’s totally fun that we are now tita enough to have a signature whatever- a signature look, drink, dish etc. It sounds so distinguished and classy. :P).
Adolescents have an excuse to experiment. It’s in their nature. We are now fully functioning adults who have acquired tastes, preferences and have made life choices that have lasting consequences. So stick to what works (and what does not make us wretch).
Anyway, these are just some more tips that I came up with. Ofcourse, a mark of true tito or tita is the skill to know better than to heed advise from some random blog. We are all much more sensible than that.
At the end of the day, age is just a number. So take this post to heart, scoff at it, or come up with your own set of rules. The only important thing is, that you end up having an epic time. These nights don’t come often anymore afterall.